英文英文英文英文幽默故事幽默故事幽默故事幽默故事：：：： There was a guy who went into a shop to buy a parrot. There werethree parrots in the shop. One was $5,000; another one, $10,000; and the third one, $30,000. The customer asked the owner, “How e this guy is $5,000? That’s so expensive for this kindof parrot.” The owner said, “Because I have trained him and he can talk.” So the customer asked him, “How about this guy? What can he do that makes him so expensive?” The owner said, “Well, apart from talking, he can also do some amusing actions,like dancing and so on. That’s why he’s so expensive.” Then the customer said, “How about the third one? What canhe do that makes him so expensive?” The owner of the shopsaid, “I don’t know. Normally, I have never heard him talk, nor dance, nor whistle, nor sing, nothing at all! But the other o call him ‘The Boss.’” 老板最大 有个人到一间商店买鹦鹉。店里有三只鹦鹉，其中一只卖五千元，另一只卖一万元，还有一只卖三万元。顾客问老板：「为什么这只要卖五千元？这个价钱对这种鹦鹉来说太贵了！」老板说：「因为我有训练他讲话。」顾客又问：「那这只呢？他会做什么？为什么要卖这么贵？」老板说：「他除了会说话之外，还会表演一些有趣的动作，好比说跳舞等等，所以才卖这么贵。」顾客接着又问：「那第三只呢？他会做什么？为什么要卖这么贵？」老板说：「我不知道。我从没听过他讲话、吹口哨或唱歌，也没看过他跳舞，什么都没有！不过另外两只叫他：『老板！』」 A Friend in Need Is a Friend Indeed Jack and Ben are good friends. One day, they explore a forest together. When they go deep into the forest, suddenly they hear a sound. “What’s that? The sound is so terrible.” Ben says. “Oh! Bear! Look! A bear!” Jack says and climbs quickly on a tall tree. Ben tries to climb on the tree. But he can’t. “What can I do? Help me please! “Ben says to Jack. But Jack does nothing. The bear is ing. Ben lies down quickly and pretends to die. The bear looks at Ben and walking around him. Ben holds his breath. The bear *** ells Ben and thinks he’s dying, and then the bear goes away. When Jack sees the bear going far, he slides down from the tree and wakes Ben. “What did the Bear whisper to you?” Jack asks Ben. “Why didn’t you help me? Have you not heard the sentence: A friend in need is a friend indeed?” Ben shouted. 故事28 患难见真情 杰克和本是一对好朋友。一天，他俩结伴去森林探险。当他们深入森林时，突然听到一个声音。 “那是什么？这声音真恐怖。”本说。 “啊！是熊！快看！熊！”杰克边说边迅速爬到身旁的颗大树上。 本试着爬在树上，可是他做不到。“我怎么办啊？快帮帮我？”本朝杰克喊道。可是杰克什么也没有做。 熊来了。本赶快躺在地上装死。熊看看本。绕着他走了儿圈。本赶忙屏住呼吸。熊又低下头闻了本，以为他死了，然后就走开了。 杰克看到熊走远了，他才滑下树来，叫醒本。“熊刚才跟你说什么了？“杰克好奇地文本。 “你刚才为什么不帮我？难道你没有听对患难见真情这句话吗？”本大声喊道 going to the sun during the night when the americans were getting ready to send their firstmen to the moon， an old irishman was watching them on tele vision in the bar of a hotel． there was an englishman in the bar too， and he said tothe irishman，“the americans are very clever， aren't they？they're going to send some men to the moon． it's a very longway from our world．” “oh that's nothing，”the irishman．answered quickly．“the irish are going to send some men to the sun in a fewmonths’ time． that's much farther away than the moon， youknow．” the englishman was very surprised when he heard this．“oh， yes， it is．” he said，“but the sun's too hot for people togo to．” the irishman laughed and answered．“well，the irish aren't stupid， you know． we won't go to the sun during theday， of course． we'll go there during the night．” 夜间到太阳上去 当美国人正准备将他们第一批宇航员送上月球时，有一个上了年纪的爱尔兰人在一家旅馆的酒巴里正从电视中观看着宇航员的壮举。 在酒巴里还有一个英国人，他对那个爱尔兰人说：“美国人真聪明，是吧？他们就要将几个人送上月球了。那儿离我们地球有好长好长的一段路呢。” “呕，那又有什么，”爱尔兰人马上回话说。“再过几个月的时间爱尔兰人要将一些人送到太阳上去呢。你是知道的，那儿比月球要远得多了。” 那英国人听了这番话，感到很吃惊，他说：“噢，是的，是远得多了，不过太阳太热了，人们去不了那儿。” 爱尔兰人大笑起来，回答说：“咳，你知道，爱尔兰人可没那么蠢。我们当然不会在白天到太阳上去。我们在夜间上太阳那儿去。” A poor pig Danny is a little pig . He is unhappy because he wants to leave home to see the world . It’s a sunny day . Danny goes away when his parents are sleeping . on his way he meets an elephant , a peacock and a rabbit . At last , he gets to a lake . He looks at his reflection in the water and says, “I wish I have an elephant’s nose , a peacock’s tail and a rabbit’s ears .” after a while , Danny’s wish es true . He runs back excitedly . But his parents can’t recognize Danny , “Go away , you’re not our son .” Danny goes to the lake again . “ I just want to be a pig .” He says sadly .Danny waits and waits . He bees a pig again . Danny runs back quickly . His parents hug and say , “ This is our lovely baby .” 可怜的小猪 丹尼是只小猪，为此他很不开心，他希望自己能够拥有大象的鼻子、孔雀的尾巴、小兔的耳朵。可是，当他的愿望实现的时候，爸爸妈妈却不认他了。可怜的小猪决定，还是变回自己原来的样子吧。